How to find love? This question every person asked himself at least once in life. Why is it so not easy to find, what is the reason, not destiny or is it not at all this?
Why people do not find love: 5 main reasons
Paradox, but despite the development of social networks, today the percentage of single people reaches 50% of the population. Those who cannot meet that “love of all life” can also enter there. Psychologists say that there are certain reasons why people cannot build long-term relationships.
Of course, the reasons may be very different, but here are 5 main ones!
We will analyze them on examples from films. So!
№1. You idealize relationships
Each person’s ideas about love are completely different. Someone was inspired by a movie or a book, but somehow people keep the image of perfect love in their heads.
The film “Bridget Jones”, clearly demonstrates that you should not idealize relationships. Sooner or later, the ideal picture collapses, and this is natural, because we are all human and are prone to make mistakes.
- What to do? You need to take your partner with his shortcomings (within reasonable limits). To understand that he may have flaws may be wrong.
№2. You do not have self-esteem
If you do not respect yourself, is it worth waiting for it from others. You should not expect that your lover will give you a feeling of self-confidence, he is not obliged to do this at all. A woman without self-esteem looks humiliated, and does not cause anything in her partner except pity …
In the movie “Holiday” the heroine Kate Winslet gave herself completely to the person who simply used it. He did not promise anything to the girl, but she was still hoping, hoping … Everything changed only after she decided to break off her unhealthy affection.
- What to do? First, it is important to learn to love and appreciate yourself independently independently, without counting on the “good fairy”. Look for support and confidence within yourself, then you will not allow yourself to connect with people who are unworthy of you.
Number 3. Violating your partner’s private space
Manipulations are different, of course, some are very appropriate in close relationships in the form of a game or coquetry. But if you suppress a partner, try to change him, make him feel his guilt for no reason, most likely it will not last long.
In the movie “Vanished” the heroine was deceived by her husband, she decided to punish him using guilt. As a result, fulfilling her stupid requests, he lost any quivering feelings for her and never returned.
- What to do? From the very beginning it is important to understand that you do not change another person. If you are ready to accept it as it is now – it is worth developing a relationship. If not, it is better to leave ashore. Well, if we are talking about a long-standing relationship, then either accept him and do not nag, or leave and give him a chance to meet the one that loves him!
№4. It’s hard for you to forgive
We often strictly evaluate the actions of others, and we easily write off our own: “well, it’s me.”
In the TV series “Friends” Rachel was never able to forgive treason Rosa, although she broke up with him and made it clear that it was all over. In the end, they forgave each other and stayed together.
- What to do? Of course, you should not close your eyes to unacceptable things, advancing yourself and your throat. But do not be too strict with your partner if you see that he truly regrets. It is worth giving a person a second chance.
№5. You are just not ready for a relationship.
For all, love is the highest joy and pleasure. Before building relationships it is sometimes important to understand yourself – what do you want?
The film “Wild” showed how the girl after parting with her beloved and losing her mother decided to go on a journey on foot. It helped her to recover and find peace inside.
- What to do? Often, people not having survived one parting immediately plunge into the following relationships. In this case, love plays the role of a “pill” of pain. But would you like to be such a temporary pill? Before you enter into a relationship, sort it out – what do you want from love and do you want a relationship now?
Be happy and share tips with friends.